Ugh, the singing

OK, so only the lead and bass guitarist and myself showed up for practice.  It was enough that we could actually run through the songs and me to learn the intros and transitions and such.  But.  I sounded even worse with absolutely no one else to sing with and no keyboard for me to hear the melody. 

It sucked.

They said I needed to sing louder and that it sounded “boring”.  I kept trying to explain part of the problem was the song was quite redundant and I was trying to sing notes that were way too low for me and I knew we needed to change keys but I don’t know enough about my singing to know and they aren’t experienced enough yet to know either.

I was straight up with them saying I know right now I can’t lead this music but I’m willing to sing crappy just so someone is at least leading the group.  They were insistent they wanted me to sing with them.  As for other singers, they seemed game for getting a “praise team” of several youth to also sing.  But trying to get random people to commit is hard.  And if this is going to work, they HAVE to be at practice.

Last evening I went over to St’s new church and listened to them practice hoping to glean some insight on how to run practice with a band.  They actually are doing some songs we are.  But I’m not sure if the practice served anything except to show awesomely excellent they are and how horrible I’m doing.

I talked to St after he got out for about an hour.  We realized I have a few problems.  For one thing, I’m trying to lead songs with a male lead line.  He has a high male voice so when I go to sing the songs the band is used to, I’m either way too high, or way too low.  And obviously during practice yestrday, I was singing way too low.  Another problem is I’m used to singing in the choir and I can either hear the melody with the track, piano or other sopranos singing.  With the band (no keyboardist right now), I have nothing.  No point of reference. 

I have to know how to sing it. 

Period. 

And I don’t. 

I’m no soloist, have never been. 

And here I’m trying to lead a band.  But honestly, part of me feels like I’m supposed to be doing this.  St has agreed to meet with me Friday and help me figure out what keys I should be singing in and we’re going to have a keyboard there.  And he’s going to show me all the resources online for the lead sheets, transposing, etc.

He also ensured me I CAN sing.  I’ve stood directly in front of him for two years as he’s lead our choir and he knows I can sing.  And St is picky.  I know he’d tell me if I couldn’t.  So I know I can do this. 

My last problem is I’m just scared out of my mind and I have to let loose and just let it go.  Get over myself and do it.

So for now I’m hanging in there.  I want to learn how to sing and how to do it my way, not St’s way.  I want to be the singer the band needs because those kids are talented and I don’t want to see it go to waste.