Positive

I can’t let this week go by without mentioning here that we submitted our adoption papers.  To be honest, it was done without much fanfare.  I took it myself to the post office when I got off work on Tuesday.  It seems so simple.  Just an envelope addressed a town away.  Just another package in the carrier’s bag.  Just another piece of mail to open in an office.  But we all know it’s so much more.

It’s another official YES.  Yes, we really mean it.  Yes, we want to help.  Yes, we’re opening our home.  Yes, we want to save you.  Or save us, may it be.  Yes, we want you as our son.  When I get to thinking on it (sorry, I’ve been reading The Help and have begun thinking like Aibileen), I get super emotional.  Somewhere our son is out there.  And that sounds sweet until you think that the only way we get him is if he gets abused or neglected.  In a weird way, sometimes I pray that we never meet him.  Not because I don’t want to but because I want his parent(s) to shape up and treat him like he deserves.

It’s a little overwhelming but honestly when I think of it it’s like some big black hole.  We have no idea what we’re walking into but somehow that darkness isn’t scary.  It’s peaceful.  I don’t get worry in the pit of my stomach.  Just peace.  I’m not naive enough to think it will be peaceful but there is peace.

So this week the proverbial ball got to rollin’.  I’m told it will be another 6 months or so before all the interviews and inspections are done and we’re approved.  They say adoption is like a paper pregnancy.  So I suppose this week it’s like two little lines showed up.

Just tell me I can start eating all the ice cream and chocolate I want and we’re going to be juuust fine.