Archives for September 2012

Dear Me

September 13, 2012 by Amy 4 Comments

Dear 16 year old Amy,

Could you spare a few minutes from your new boyfriend to read this letter? I know it will be hard. You can’t seem to take your eyes or hands off of him, but I know you’re smart and really want to do the right thing so listen up.

That boy that has stolen your attention? You’re right–he’s a keeper. He’ll make you crazy and you’re gonna go through some hard things together but he’s worth hanging on to. So enjoy all those kisses, the glazed over eyes and yes, even the cheesy poems and letters. It doesn’t last forever.

But the waiting? It’s worth the judgment and the explanations and all the no’s. Your wedding night is awkward and painful and not anything like the movies but it will be all kinds of good and right and you do get better. So much better.

Quit worrying about that cute boy at church who said you were ugly. He’ll grow up and still won’t be able to take his eyes off himself long enough to realize he was wrong.

And that girl you want to be just like? She’s beautiful and great and all. But so are you. I wish you’d realize you just need to be you instead of a poor carbon copy of some other girl.

Stop obsessing over your waistline.

Relax, please. I know your mom wants you to do your best at school and you do too but that doesn’t mean you have to do THE best. Study a little less and spend time with your friends and family a little more.

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Those moments you have with God where tears drip on your Bible and you hug your pillow tight? Trust those. He’s really real and He’ll keep meeting you over and over and saving you over and over.

And on that note, quit trying to be so perfect so He loves you more. No matter what you do, He’ll still be there. Give yourself some grace. I’m not telling you to purposefully screw up, but don’t be scared and fearful when you do.

And more than that, quit expecting everyone else to be so perfect. You and your friends are just kids right now and for goodness sakes, you’re all just human. No one ever really figures life out and gets it right. The best thing you can do is love with abandon and not judgment.

But that love you feel for the ignored and the hurt? Follow that more. You’ll still feel that way later and it will lead you down the right paths.

Let go of the fear. All of it.

Appreciate your parents even more than you do. You don’t realize it but not everyone has parents like yours. Say thank you more, hug them more and don’t complain so much when you have to wash dishes.

Please pay more attention in English. You think you’re a math whiz, but it turns out you kind of like that writing business.

Now if I know you and I think I do, you’ll make this in to a checklist and try to follow it to a T. Don’t. Just throw it away. Throw all your lists away and just enjoy life a little more. Maybe you’ll help me finally learn how to let go.

Love,

34 Year Old You

This post was written in part for the launch of Emily Freeman’s book Graceful.

Maternity Shirt Shopping

September 12, 2012 by Amy 9 Comments

Pictured above is me and my sister at my mom’s house Monday night for her birthday. We went out to eat and then had cupcakes at her house. The weather just turned cooler this week so I was glad to finally slip on my beloved jeans. Apparently my sister was too. Although we’re known for wearing matching outfits on accident. That’s a whole other post! But there’s a secret about the tops we’re wearing.

We’re both wearing maternity shirts.

Yep. My sister started wearing a maternity shirt after my pregnancies a few years ago. Then recently, she bought this blue striped tee. She said it’s comfy and she thinks the cut is flattering. I agree.

I thought I never wanted to see another maternity shirt again after my pregnancies. But. My girls are obsessed with anything to do with pregnancies and babies right now. We have a local maternity shop call The Bump in town and they just beg me to even go look inside. Last week we went in and I was bemoaning how cute maternity clothes had become compared to 8-10 years ago when I was pregnant.

I was pushing through the Clearance rack and saw this green and white striped top. The girls know I love stripes and just begged me to put it on. To appease them, I did. I got it on and was shocked. I loved the length. I loved the folds in the front. They weren’t slouching too much as you might expect of maternity and the cut was actually flattering. The stretchy fabric was extremely soft and well, stretchy.

The salesperson said many maternity pieces are being made now to perform double-duty and this one in particular was meant to have a tighter fit. I remembered Heather wearing maternity before, and well, I was sold. Well, it was sold.

My girls were beyond thrilled. We’re still working on not telling everyone we see that I’m wearing a maternity shirt when I have it on.

Now, I’m not saying I’m buying strictly maternity but I’m just sayin’ you might want to give that clearance rack a little whirl. For those of you that have been recently pregnant and aren’t entirely sick of your maternity wardrobe, dig up those bags of Goodwill clothes and see what you can reuse. Worked for me!

This post is linked to What I Wore Wednesday and Works for me Wednesday

A Post for the Mommas Part II

September 11, 2012 by Amy 2 Comments

Yesterday’s post clearly struck a chord with some folks. The bottom line is parenting little ones is hard. I remember so many days I felt so overwhelmed, I wasn’t sure if it would ever get better.

While there is no doubt they are hard, there are moments tucked inside the hard that make it all worth it. And they are moments you can’t manufacture any other way. Moments, that like diamonds, are produced under great pressure with brilliant results.

Like feeling a baby hiccupping inside your tummy.

Like looking into your baby’s face and seeing your features beautifully melded with features of that boy’s you fell in love with in high school.

Like looking at your Mom in the birthing room and saying I did it, I really did it and knowing she knows because she did the same thing with you.

Or like smelling new baby hair and feeling it rest on your arms while you cuddle.

Or watching your body change and produce and solely nourish a baby for months.

Like seeing that first smile.

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Or watching your husband get on the floor and help teach a little baby to crawl and then nothing like the look you exchange when they do it.

Like seeing a person take their first steps.

Or singing the ABC song ad nauseum and then listening as a little one sings it back to you.

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Or watching a little one see rainbow or a tiger or a fish or many, many, other beautiful things for the first time.

Like watching a simple hug or smile completely calm your child down.

Or hearing “I wuv you, mommy.”

Or figuring out that your child loves ketchup or hates onions or can’t live without goldfish.

Parenting sure is hard but there is nothing like it. Every single hard time is worth just seconds of the good times.

When things get tough, I always tell myself This too shall pass. It helps me remember that the bad won’t last long, but more importantly, that the good won’t either so be grateful while it lasts.

There’s no doubt the hard is hard but don’t forget the good is oh so good.

A Post for the Mommas

September 10, 2012 by Amy 18 Comments

Last week I read this post at Momastery. She included two letters from sister moms of infants and she wanted her readers to leave some comments with hope on how to survive the younger years. For whatever reason, I didn’t comment. Maybe because I knew nearly 500 other people would.

Saturday night we babysat my nephew’s daughter. She’s two and a half. She’s as sweet as she can be. She’s funny. She’s also independent, as many 2 year olds are. I was transported back 5 years to when my now 7 and 9 year olds were that age.

And I was glad they’re 7 and 9.

Yesterday I was at church with a couple that had a 2 year old and an infant. The dad was keeping track of the 2 year old and the mom was feeding the wee one standing right in the middle of the hallway.

While we were standing there, a frustrated momma came by with a squirming toddler on each hip. I wanted to take one off her hands, help them to nursery and then give her a nice back massage.

I’m convinced those of you reading with young ones need to hear some encouragement. You can do this. It won’t always be hard like right now. Sure, it will be hard but in different ways.

A day is coming where you don’t have to worry about anyone’s poop schedule but your own.

You won’t even have to look at poop all day if you don’t want to.

In fact, there will be weeks that go by where you don’t even care if anyone else is pooping.

A day is coming when you get to eat a meal where you don’t have to scoop even one bite of food into someone else’s mouth.

You’ll get to eat every single bite of your own food.

And better yet, none of the food will come from your own body!

In fact, since you’ve learned how to eat a dinner in 90 seconds, you’ll actually finish before anyone else instead of being the lone survivor at the dinner table.

And yes, there’s a day when all of you will sit in normal chairs around an actual dinner table. And you’ll ask questions about their day and they’ll tell you and you’ll all laugh and actually enjoy this part of your day.

A day is coming when you don’t have to be in the same room to bathe your children.

You actually get to say grab a towel and go get in the shower.

And they do it. And they know how to shampoo and conditioner their hair. AND brush it when they get out.

It’s coming, momma.

A day is coming when you don’t have to go through gymnastics to get your child to sleep.

You’ll be able to say bedtime and they know what that means. They’ll know how to brush their teeth and get their own pajamas on and read to themselves.

In fact, you’ll have to remind yourself to spend time with them at night just so you don’t miss the best part of the day. Yes! Bedtime will one day be wonderful.

A day is coming when they sleep through the night.

And sometimes, they’ll throw up during the night and they’ll just tell you about it in the morning. “Mom, I even made it to the toilet.”

Doesn’t that sound glorious?

A day is coming when you won’t even know what room they’re in when they’re playing.

You’ll have to walk around and find them and ask what they’ve been doing. And the best part is it won’t be fingerpainting the walls, unbuckling their diaper and smearing it on carpet or rubbing diaper cream all over their face.

A day is coming when you don’t have to pack 80 things to leave the house.

In fact, the kids will want to grab a few of their favorite things and you can just say, “Come out to the car when you’re ready and shut the door on your way out.”

And when they come out, you don’t have to buckle a single person except yourself.

And while you’re driving, you don’t have to entertain a single soul to keep them from crying.

A day is coming when they won’t say no every time you tell them to do something.

In fact, sometimes they’ll even ask you what they should do.

All of this and more is coming. It gets easier. Parenting gets funner. Yes, funner. But it gets that way because you did the hard work.

They’ll know how to shower because you taught them.

They’ll know how to play because you taught them.

They’ll know how to eat because you taught them.

Hang on, mommas. I know these are hard years, but they’re good years. You can do it.

Today’s my mom’s birthday so I can’t let this post go without saying happy birthday and thank you, Mom, for your hard work of raising wee ones.

That One Political Post

September 6, 2012 by Amy 10 Comments

Oh boy, folks. I think I’m in the throes of writing a political post. My blog might break up with me. But alas I can’t quit thinking about this and as you know, the only way to make it stop is to write about it. So yay, you get another political post to read. I promise not to be mean though, ok? Promise.

Ok, so we’re Republicans. I guess you probably guessed that but I just want to level-set here. Fox News is playing in the background as I type this and it’s normally on every day. It makes me insane. I can’t stand how everyone argues and talks over each other and I’m always like, they’re so mean! And that’s usually as close to politics as I go.

We watched the RNC speeches last week and just because I felt like I needed to be informed and fair, I watched Bill Clinton last night. I have to say, he’s smooth. I was just 17 when he was vying for his last term and honestly didn’t pay attention much but I so appreciated that Clinton actually spoke about issues and I could understand them. And he was funny.

Todd Heisler/The New York Times

So there was one part that he spoke about and other Democrats had alluded to that I really liked it and yet, it’s what is rubbing me the wrong way:

My fellow Americans, all of us in this grand hall and everybody watching at home, when we vote in this election, we’ll be deciding what kind of country we want to live in. If you want a winner-take- all, you’re-on-your-own society, you should support the Republican ticket. But if you want a country of shared opportunities and shared responsibility, a we’re-all-in-this-together society, you should vote for Barack Obama and Joe Biden.

So that gets me pretty excited. All this sharing and all. One of my favorite passages in Acts reflects just this:

Acts 4:32-35

³²All the believers were one in heart and mind. No one claimed that any of their possessions was their own, but they shared everything they had. ³³With great power the apostles continued to testify to the resurrection of the Lord Jesus. And God’s grace was so powerfully at work in them all ³⁴that there were no needy persons among them. For from time to time those who owned land or houses sold them, brought the money from the sales ³⁵and put it at the apostles’ feet, and it was distributed to anyone who had need.

So yeah, it sounds like they’re singing the same song, right?

I think the difference though is how it is being shared.

If you know me and have read here long, you might know that I’m more for an individual approach to this. Listen. I paid for medical care for someone yesterday for a procedure that wasn’t covered by Medicaid. I’m putting my money where my mouth is.

I’ve been reading Bonhoeffer the past week and you don’t need to know anything except that he went as far as to die for his faith in Nazi Germany and before that, he was highly effective at helping people individually. It’s quite inspiring.

I’m also for this idea of pooling resources together and then distributing. I mean, that IS what the apostles did. They all laid their money at the apostles’ feet and distributed it. Even Romans suggests we pay taxes for this purpose.

Romans 13:6

New International Version (NIV)

⁶This is also why you pay taxes, for the authorities are God’s servants, who give their full time to governing.

Here’s the problem, though. Many Democrats (not ALL) don’t see the pooling of resources as a task or even responsibility from God. In fact, many Democrats are pushing for God to be completely out of government as hard as they can. Did you read where some actually booed God being kept in a section of platform?

So no, I’m not for pooling my resources with people who have no desire to do it under God’s authority and power. Should it perhaps be the church that is responsible for taking care of the poor? (said with some sarcasm) If we did have more money from less taxes we would have more money to individually and communally, as a church, help people.

So what’s a Christian who sometimes agrees with Republicans and sometimes likes what a Democrat has to say?

Here’s my only answer: I stick with God. And for me, that means helping someone who doesn’t have coverage and selling my possessions and giving them to the poor and sponsoring Compassion kids and adopting little a little boy without a father. In other words, to the best of my ability, I will pay my taxes as it is required and then do what I can to help the church be the church. As for my vote, I will vote for someone who helps me do that better and I truly believe that’s the Republican ticket.

But I guess I just want to say I hear you, Democrats and I like your ideas sometimes. But Republicans aren’t cold, heartless people that only care about building their wealth for themselves. I’m not interested in leaving people high and dry as Clinton suggested. Romney talked a lot about his charity last week. I think we all want to help people but I think we have to realize why we do that and who gives us the authority and power to do so. Without that, I’m truly afraid for the United States.

I’m not being melodramatic. As I’m reading Bonhoeffer, I’m seeing so many parallels to Nazi Germany and ya’ll, it seriously scares me to death.

All I can say is I’m praying. Neither candidate is our Messiah. They’re not. None of us have it right really. It will only be under God’s authority that any good happens no matter who is President. God bless the United States, indeed.

PS. I had to rewrite much of this post. As I was writing, Live Writer completely crashed on me, losing much of it. I guess my blog does want to break up? I hope you don’t.

Need a Lift?

September 5, 2012 by Amy 8 Comments

Does anyone else need a lift? And no, not a face lift or a lift to the Walmarts. Do you say that—can I get a lift? I wonder if that’s regional or what. I don’t say it so I’m curious. I don’t saw Walmarts either but I think it’s funny to read it that way. Anyway. A lift. Do you need one? Just a general, let’s make life just a teensy bit better kind of lift. I do.

And I’ve realized more and more this week how big of a difference the little things make.

Getting up early.

Going to bed on time.

Flossing.

Taking your medication.

Reading.

Drinking more water.

Stretching.

Being grateful.

All these habits add up to a positive, consistent, healthy, productive life. And some of us need a little help. Yes? I mean, seriously, if you are drinking 8 glasses of water AND flossing AND getting up early every single day, we need to have a conversation. One in which you might feel some pain.

I got in on a Beta Release of a new iPhone app called, wait for it….Lift. Lift’s tagline is “unlock your potential”. Basically, Lift just gamifies all these little, daily, sometimes-annoying but necessary tasks that make your life better.

It’s a simple app but could be very powerful for some people.

You just add the tasks you want help remembering to do.

Then each day, you get to click a huge button that turns green after you’ve done it.

OK, so I’m silly and easily pleased and love checkmarks so this helps me. You also get to see a summary of what you’ve done in green.

Now listen. It seems like it might be worthless but I have gotten out of my bed, gone to floss my teeth just so I can click that little button.

I know, it’s probably sad that I need motivation like this but at the end of the day (literally), it really helped.

I think it would be even better if I had more friends! You can “like” someone’s check-in and see their comments. I try to share what I’m grateful for or what I made for dinner. I think it’s kind of inspiring.

Maybe it would give you a lift too? (pst, it’s free)