Archives for November 2012

Five Minute Friday: Wonder

November 30, 2012 by Amy 8 Comments

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He hurts again and follows a path he ought not go. I wonder where is the justice? When will my God follow through of his promise to spite my enemies?

I wonder when I got so hard, so worried about making it right, so incapable of forgiving the 77 times.

I wonder if I’m doing it right. Any of it. Is it pleasing to Him? His will, his way?

I wonder if I’ll ever quit caring about what they think—second guess every decision instead of just letting joy be joy.

I wonder if he will ever be healed. Will his words not ever sting and my attempts thrown in my face. Will I ever stop trying, putting myself out there knowing I will be hurt again, him incapable of returning what I offered.

In all my wondering, I forget it is He whom I must wonder on.

He will provide justice–and more, grace–in His way. He will give me grace to forgive. He will heal, both he and me. He will direct paths.

If I only marvel at him, give him my rapt attention, wonder at the person instead of wandering my own way. Then, the wondering and wandering will cease and true wonder begins.

Write for 5 minutes flat – no editing, no over thinking, no backtracking.

Should Christians Play the Lottery?

November 29, 2012 by Amy 8 Comments

Last night was one of the biggest lottery drawings in history. An individual had a chance to get a pay out of over 300 million dollars. By the way, I cannot say that without accenting it like Dr. Evil’s meeellion dollars.

Having that much money scares me to death, to be honest. Too many decisions and responsibility. However, it could do a lot of good for my family and a lot of organizations I care about so I’ve been debating whether or not I should play.

Historically, I’ve blanketed the lottery as gambling and therefore bad. I voted against the SC lottery in the 90’s. However, I then proceeded to benefit from it with the the SC Life scholarship in college. It felt hypocritical in some way even though I didn’t ask for the scholarship as it is based on grades.

As I’ve batted this around in my head, I thought I’d work it out here and perhaps we’d come out with some good discussion.

Reasons against the lottery:

You gamble your money when you buy a ticket. Gambling is bad. Therefore, the lottery is bad.
I know of people whose lives and families are terribly ruined by an addiction to gambling and I don’t want my money to support it.
Contrary to popular belief, money usually makes things more complicated, not easier and it’s not the be-all end-all solution to people’s problems as they believe. Have you seen the horror stories of people going into debt, descending into crime and even being stalked and killed after winning? This is no good.

Reason for lottery:

The state and its residents benefit from the money as I was with my college scholarship. This is good.
Much benefit can be made for the winners of the lottery and those around them. Scott said “Someone has to win, shouldn’t it be us who would do something good with it versus someone else?” Good point, husband.
Even though the lottery can cause addiction, we don’t quit drinking Mountain Dew, eating Taco Bell or taking cold medicine because it has the capacity to do the same. That logic doesn’t stick when you start applying it to other things. Furthermore, 401K is basically gambling your money too and no one seems to have a problem with that.
The Bible is wrought with decisions being made by chance. People often casted lots to make decisions.
Contrary to the belief I’ve held for so long, the Bible never clearly talks about gambling as a sin. Or, I haven’t found one since researching this. Someone please direct me to one.

Given that logic, I still feel up in the air about it. While it can do a lot of harm, it also can do a lot of good.

Let’s see if we can put a wider lens on the topic. While the Bible does not condemn the lottery directly, it does give lots of information on how we should view work and money. Let’s see how those might apply:

Most want to win the lottery so they don’t have to work. The Bible does not look favorably on lazy people.
I know it sounds nice to retire permanently to a private island, but we cannot carry out the Great Commission living a life like that (darn it!).
Coveting is a sin and often, we want to win the lottery to have what others have instead of being grateful for what we already have.
Getting money often makes you more greedy and materialistic, not less. Love of money is the root of all evil. However, money itself isn’t the root of all evil.
Proven: gambling can become an addiction. We should not be slaves to anyone but the Lord.
We are supposed to be good stewards of our money. Is it wise to give money to a lottery where we often will have no direct benefit? Wouldn’t it be wiser to make a direct, personal impact to either our own college savings or someone needy around us? However, we are directed to take care of the poor and needy with our resources and winning could certainly help fund many good deeds.

Given all that, might I suggest it comes down to the heart? Why is that you want to play and win? Is it really to help others or is it rooted in greed, covetousness, laziness or addiction? Are you prepared to steward the money well?

I truly believe God can use any single thing he wants to accomplish his desires and if He leads a Christian to play and win in order to accomplish good, then rock on.

The bottom line is we must check our intent and ultimately, live out the command to live by the Spirit in all things. Did you pray about playing? What did the Spirit lead you to do?

What does this mean for me? I think I’ll be sitting the lotto out until I get clear direction to play.

I do have a very obsessive and addictive personality and I don’t need one more thing to battle.
As much as I say and have plans to help others, I can be quite greedy when it comes to money and I think getting that much would just fuel it.
I believe that much money would just add more stress to my life, not make it easier. Just the thought of someone killing me for my money scares me away. I’ve already been stolen from with what I have and it’s really not something I want to experience in any capacity in the future.
I would rather direct my money somewhere that I know is helpful rather than leaving it up to a group to decide where it might be helpful to me in the future. If you don’t think $2 is a big deal, did you know $1 can give someone water for an entire year?

What insights do YOU have? What did I miss? Why do you play or not? Let’s discuss!

What I Wore Wednesday 11.28.2012

November 28, 2012 by Amy 7 Comments

Today’s the day I share my outfits from the week with The Pleated Poppy’s What I Wore Wednesday. I pair my outfits with inspirational photos. Read more about that here.

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But the basic reality of God is plain enough. Open your eyes and there it is! By taking a long and thoughtful look at what God has created, people have always been able to see what their eyes as such can’t see: eternal power, for instance, and the mystery of his divine being. Romans 1:19-20 (MSG)

Hart of Dixie

November 27, 2012 by Amy 11 Comments

OK I have a new show for you. And for those of you with Netflix, pay special attention.

So. My friend Mary Carver kept writing about Hart of Dixie. It was on my list when it debuted last year and I just never found the time to watch it. Well, Mary assured me at Allume that I needed to watch and since Scott has been on night shift the past month, I’ve been using my night to catch up. And ya’ll, season one was so good!

The gist of the show is Zoe Hart is trying to be a surgeon in NYC (same kind as Grey’s Cristina Yang) but gets turned down for a fellowship so she finally accepts a General Physician’s job in small-town Bluebell, Alabama. It turns out she’s not very wanted and struggles to fit in but it makes for some great TV.

It took a good 5 or 6 episodes to really love it but I do now and here’s 10 non-spoilerish reasons why:

First and foremost, you must know I love that one of my beloved FNL characters is one of the leads. I love that Scott Porter plays a similar type of role with Bluebell’s town attorney George Tucker. I mean, QB1 and small-town attorney aren’t exactly similar but they’re similar in that he plays one of the town favorites in both shows.
I never watched Rachel Bilson in The OC so I’m not really sure how to compare characters or her acting but I simply adore Zoe Hart. She’s smart and fashionable and funny and horrible with guys and yeah, I love her. Did I mention I love her clothes? Even Scott won’t quit talking about her shoes Did you see those shoes? Those are awesome. Look at those shoes.
Who cannot love Wade? He’s the bad boy everyone loves to hate, or you know, just love to love. If I were single, he’d be welcome to come paint my house any day.
I love that they picked a former NFL star as The Mayor. It’s so random but so awesome too. Lavon Hayes would say so too, I think. Speaking of, did you know I heard Michael Jordan has a house not 10 minutes from me? I had a friend say they nearly ran into him when he was pulling into his neighborhood. Anyhoo.
Lemon. Oh, Lemon. I seriously cannot believe they named her that. I don’t know that I like Lemon but she sure is interesting to watch and the Jaime King plays her to absolute Southern perfection.
I enjoy Zoe’s lifeline to her high school friend, Rose. I feel like we get a glimpse into the high school/CW realm without actually having to live in it all the time.
I really like how they play the big city against the small town. I definitely find myself pulled in both directions. I live in the suburbs but work in the city and enjoy bigger cities. I appreciate both sides so it’s kind of nice to reminisce about NYC (I know, all of my 3 visits) with Zoe and make fun of their small town-ness but I also love how The Mayor, Lemon and other residents stick up for their small town.
I enjoy the medical side of the show. I know it’s no ER or Grey’s but I like it that way. I like a little suspense when someone gets a snake bite or something. Nothing too dramatic but enough to keep you involved.
The Southern Belles. I can’t help it, I love all of Lemon’s friends. Although I’m in South Carolina, to my knowledge we don’t have these Southern Belles and I just find the whole thing entertaining. In fact, DO these people exist in the South these days? Anyone? Annabeth is my favorite and she is HILARIOUS. There was one episode in particular when she was actually being friends with Zoe and it was pure gold.
OK and finally and not surprisingly–I LOVE the love triangles. Zoe-Wade-George and George-Lemon-Lavon could go on forever and I’d be happy. And does anyone else want to see Zoe and Lavon just one time figure out if they could work? I mean, I feel like there’s something there, no?

Now, I’m not TOTALLY sold on the whole deal. Their morals are out the door. This is no family-friendly show. Someone is always scheming and lying. I’ve been pretty disappointed in Season 2 especially with all the friends with benefits things going on. Not a fan of Zoe going there. I mean, he IS cute but come on, Zoe Hart, have some scruples. It is what it is, though. It’s near to impossible to find a show that isn’t like this in some respect.

But given that, it’s such a unique, interesting, fun, heart-warming world to live in for an hour a week.

So the entire first season is on Netflix and if you hurry up you can watch most of Season 2 on Hulu!

Do you watch Hart of Dixie? Let’s chat in the comments!

This post is linked up with Top Ten Tuesday

Tenth Birthday Party and a Few iPod Touch Rules

November 26, 2012 by Amy 9 Comments

Whew, a four day weekend is just what I needed. Bookcases were organized, rugs were cleaned, trees were decorated, turkey was eaten—all in a good Thanksgiving weekend.

Since I took a little bloggy break I haven’t told you about Emma’s 10th birthday party last week. I cried my little eyes out on Monday about it, but Tuesday I held it together–it was time to celebrate!

She loosely had a dance-themed party so the girls played Just Dance on the Wii and made up their own dances to perform.

A few notes on the pictures:

You can see in the top left, somehow I scheduled this party on a night Scott had to work so I had all the giggling girls to myself for most of the night. I finally had to come sit in the room so they’d go to sleep.
In the bottom left, you can spy Emma reading some clues to her BIG present. The girls LOVED the scavenger hunt we threw together last minute.
The girls are putting on makeup there in the center. I love that girls do that naturally. I didn’t teach them to get in a circle and apply makeup but somehow girls + sleepovers = makeup sessions.
Had to include a few of Emma with her candles getting ready to blow them out. And yes, I whispered goodbye, single digits.
The cake is from Sweet Scene Cakes! She did a fantastic job taking our simple idea and incorporating themes from the party.

The highlight of the night was the new iPod Touch.

Emma has been asking for one of her own for years but since the girls got their own Nintendo DS a few years back it just didn’t seem necessary. At the time, we told Emma she could have an iPod when she turned 10. It seemed like forever away. Turns out it wasn’t.

I kind of wish now we’d just have to started out with the iPod Touch. Yes, it’s more expensive up front but by the time you buy a few DS games, you are spending the same, if not way more with the DS.

The difference, of course, is the Internet.

Emma was one of the last of her friends to get an iPod Touch so she has 5-6 friends she messages. If the last 5 days are any indication, it turns out 10 year olds don’t have that much to talk about.

In fact, Scott and I have enjoyed messaging her the most and it’s just another fun way to connect with her. I liked being able to message her while she was at a sleepover over the weekend and let’s face it, it’s nice to message instead of yelling across the house if I know she’s on it.

We let her get an account on Instagram. She has a blocked profile and is only allowed to connect with females she knows.

And of course, she uses it to play all the games that she normally tied my phone up playing. Lexi no longer has to share when we’re in the car. A to the men for no more fights.

She doesn’t surf the web and has no need for it. Even at home, she usually is only on for school work or playing games, which don’t do well on Apple devices. I don’t think she’s opened Safari since she’s had it.

Given all that, we still had her sign a contract. It may seem like a little much, but we want to be clear and up front about expectations and have something to rely on if things go awry. One of her friend’s mom sent me a phone contract she found (Thanks, Sarah!). I edited it for an iPod and added a few rules of my own.

Here is a glimpse of the 17 rules:

1. My iPod Touch must be turned off by my bedtime and placed in the living room. It is my responsibility to be sure the iPod Touch is being charged when necessary.

2. During family meals, my iPod Touch will be turned off or silenced and in my pocket or placed away from the table. I will not check texts or play games during meal time.

3. I will practice proper etiquette when using my iPod Touch in public places, and be conscious of how my usage affects those around me. I will make sure my iPod Touch is turned off or silenced when I am in church, restaurants, or other quiet settings, and I will not take texts or play games during those times.

If you’d like a printable version, here ya go: iPod Touch Rules (PDF).

I’m actually pretty glad we are able to spend a few years with iPod practice before she gets a full-on cell phone.

I’m curious. What age were your kids when they got their first cell phone? Already time to start setting expectations!

What I Wore Wednesday 11.21.2012

November 20, 2012 by Amy 2 Comments

Today’s the day I share my outfits from the week with The Pleated Poppy’s What I Wore Wednesday. I pair my outfits with inspirational photos. Read more about that here.

We’re cleared to wear jeans at work the rest of the year but I just can’t seem to wear them without heels and a blazer. Why this animal print reminded me of a horse, I don’t know. I think it was the brown and black combination.

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After looking for pictures of horses, I felt like wearing leggings and boots. Even though animal print rain boots wouldn’t do for horseback riding, they’re brownish and it *was* raining that day. Why do I not wear leggings more often? That outfit was the most comfortable one of the week. I went zero places so it was perfect for my day at home.

I rarely mix animal prints like this but I’m ok with this one. I think. And yes, this still reminded me of horses.

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And yes, another horse.

OK, up to this point of the post, I wasn’t understanding why I kept picking horses, but I realized there was a reason. Jump to the bottom and I’ll tie it together for you.

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OK if you want, hang with me on a little story and I’ll explain all the horses this week.

Yesterday I wrote about my daughter turning 10 and how she’s made me brave. I realized as I was picking these inspirational pictures through the week (and before I even thought about what to write) that I was constantly drawn to horses. Which, if you know me, is surprising because I’ve always hated horses. OK, not hated horses. I loved horses. Cried when they got hurt in movies. But ride them? NO THANK YOU. I wrote a little about it in this Weekend Recap.

Then Monday, when I was writing that post, I realized that not only had I been wearing a lot of black/grey in a sort mourning, I realized that I had been picking out these horse-related pictures and there was a definite connection to Emma and my post. I don’t think I ever wrote about it here (maybe?) but I finally rode a horse this summer in an attempt to get Emma to ride it. See? She makes me brave.

The horses were a sort of metaphor for the courage I’ve found as her mother.

But wait, there’s more.

Monday night after I’d written that post, I realized Emma had her birthday pin she was going to wear to school on my nightstand. I knew if I didn’t put it with her stuff that we’d forget Tuesday morning. So I slid out of bed and went in her room and decided to pin it right on her shirt she had picked out for her birthday. Guess which shirt she had picked out? The only one she owns with a horse on the front.

I’ve been looking for God in these inspirational pictures and this week, I found Him in spades.

Ten Years

November 20, 2012 by Amy 9 Comments

Twenty-four years ago I sat at the head of an oak dining room table with ten candles atop my cake. In the chairs sat my sister and a few friends. My mom and dad crowded around, taking pictures and singing. I looked at my cake, closed my eyes and whispered in my mind to no one in particular, “Good-bye, single digits.”

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“I did it. I really did it.” Those were my first weepy words to my mom 10 years ago as my first tiny baby was passed around the birth room. I had been scared to death of giving birth but somehow by God’s grace, my body cooperated like so many others before me and had birthed a tiny little Emma Grace.

I spent the next few days trying to figure out nursing, fielding visitors with this new grandbaby girl, and managing pain. When the last day arrived, we dressed in her little outfit and Scott put us in the back seat of our black Chrysler. I realized amidst all the activity in the past few days, months really, that I had this tiny little person in a really big world I was responsible for. I think I cried the whole way home and then sat on the couch in the living room and did the same.

I was scared to death.

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A few months later, a friend who had known me since college was chatting with me and he said, “You’ve changed since you had Emma.”

“Changed?” I asked, “How do you mean?”

“I don’t know,” he fumbled, “You just have.”

I wasn’t sure what he meant exactly, I mean, I’m sure my conversations were different, but I still felt like me.

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“I don’t want to depress you,” the doctor said at the end of our check-up last week, “but I think I should point out that you’re more than half way done with your time with Emma at home. Make sure to enjoy your time.”

It was too late to depress me. I’ve been counting down until 10 for 10 years. What is it about 10? Maybe because I had remembered so distinctly turning 10 myself. It felt like a turning point of sorts. The numbers look a lot like teen ages–a lot like the years when you start kissing and driving and working and more to the point, leaving.

I birthed a tiny Emma Grace but she won’t stop this growing business.

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I read this post from Lisa-Jo yesterday and a line broke me.

There is no book knowledge that can prepare you for the act of creation or how brave you will become.

Brave. Yes. That is the change Emma has made in me.

I was just a scared little girl in a Chrysler not sure how to take care of a fearless little girl.

I realize now I had birthed Emma, but she birthed a mother in me. I was an infant mother, starting on a path to bravery.

She’s changed me these past 10 years. She’s made me brave.

I’ll endure pain when necessary, have tough conversation that scare me, check dark closets when I’m not sure what awaits, fight when there’s a need. I’d walk in front of a train for her.

Yes, she’s built courage in me.

And a lot of other things.

She’s made me more brave and selfless and disciplined and loving and patient.

All 10 years she’s been making me a better person.

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Emma’s name Emma Grace means “full of grace”. She’s that to everyone but she especially has been a gift of grace from God to me. God knew to make me more like him, I needed a tiny girl full of grace to teach me, change me.

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I’ve been putting my What I Wore Wednesday post together for tomorrow and realized every day I’ve been wearing grey or black. Looking back, I think subconsciously it’s been a sort of mourning week for me.

It’s been a week of saying goodbye to her first ten years with us for certain, but also a mourning of me. A glorious, wonderful mourning of the old me my love of Emma helped me conquer.

My friend was right. I am different. My tiny little Emma Grace has changed me and this week of celebration of both her birth and Thanksgiving, I cannot think of anything I am more thankful for than 10 years of hard, terribly draining, wonderfully changing years with my Emma Grace.

It turns out that love does conquer all.

Tomorrow I’ll watch as she blows out her own 10 candles and in my mind, I’ll whisper to no one in particular, “Goodbye single digits.”

2012-10-19

Baby girl, I love you and your giggling at boys, and sarcasm at your daddy, and your frustration and love of your sister, and your reading past bed time and your loving of little babies and crazy dancing and mismatched clothing and your teaching at your white board and your curly hair and your hazel eyes and freckled nose. I love every single inch of you. Thank you for changing me. You fill me full of grace and I thank God every day for making me your mommy.

Weekend Recap

November 19, 2012 by Amy Leave a Comment

My weekend ranged from closing the sparkly chapter of my life with the Breaking Dawn finale Friday night to spending a few hours at the Southern Women’s Christmas show in Charlotte yesterday.

I haven’t done a weekend recap post in quite some time and it seems like a good weekend to share.

Breaking Dawn

Friday night my sister and I saw Breaking Dawn Part 2. In the past year or so my obsession with the Twilight franchise had waned but I needed to see this last movie for closure. Yes, it was a thing that needed closure. I went into with “I just hope it’s better than the first.” This movie franchise has left a lot to be desired, yes? I’m already wishing for remakes. But ya’ll, I was pleasantly surprised. In fact, more than surprised, I was downright satisfied.

Finally Bella and Edward seemed to fit in their own skin. I think partly because they were portraying now-equal and happy characters and partly because Kristen and Rob had grown has actors too. It was a beautiful thing to see. The movie hit on all the important moments—Bella meeting Renesmee, Bella knocking Jac0b around, the cabin, Charlie. And yes, the final scene with the Volturi. I refuse to spoil it but I think it might go down as one of my favorite movie viewing moments ever. EVER. It was genius what they did. The final scene when Edward finally sees Bella’s memories and we could experience them too was just a perfect ending. I’m walking away from Twilight a happy participant to all the madness.

Training Tucker

Saturday morning we took Tucker to dog training. Did I tell you yet we put him in training? Turns out Tucker will do just about anything for a treat and he is one of the best in class. He’s a smart dog. Just too much energy for his own good.

Serving Thanksgiving

Saturday afternoon the girls and I served with Serving Meals Ministry. We passed out Thanksgiving meals to a low-income section of town. It was one of my favorite hours of the whole weekend. We thought we were going to be serving at tables in a fellowship hall but we actually took meals in to-go boxes door to door. It sounds kind of scary and campy but let me assure you it was not. When you have something to offer for free that is good, it immediately takes the pressure off. The residents were grateful and extremely nice.

I’ve had this concept of lights for the past few weeks. As a handful of us were each taking a door in one of the sections of the townhouses, I could not help but think about light. You know when you’re going into a dark room and the door is opening and as the door opens, each thing in the room is illuminated bit by bit? That’s what I saw when a group of us went door to door. It was like a door was opening on the townhouses, each home being illuminated as we visited. A beautiful picture of God’s light shining into the darkness and one that I will not soon forget.

I’m only sharing because I want to first share that it’s not scary and in fact, very fun, and second so locals might be aware. Serving Meals Ministry does this once a month and needs volunteers. Let me know if you’re interested and maybe next time we can go together!

Playing Chuck E. Cheese

Saturday evening I took the girls to Chuck E. Cheese. Lexi’s birthday was a few weeks ago and Emma turns 10 tomorrow. I’m having small break downs as I go about this matter. I can’t handle the double-digits apparently. I still remember sitting at our oak table blowing out my own 10 candles thinking to myself, “Goodbye, single digit years.” It feels impossible that Emma is turning 10. To cope, we’re doing lots of celebrating.

We went to Great Wolf Lodge last month, I took them to get their nails done at a kids spa last weekend, they each are having sleepovers and on the spur of the moment, I took them by myself to Chuck E. Cheese Saturday night.

I realized it’s highly likely that Chuck E. Cheese isn’t going to be cool soon and as maniacal as that place is, I really was going to miss their excitement over it. So we played skee ball and they wasted their coins on fake ID cards and we ate bad pizza and drank soft drinks. It was everything people love to hate about Chuck E. Cheese. And since my wallet was screaming for more punishment, we hopped down to the shopping mall strip to Party City where we got all the supplies for Emma’s party tomorrow. I can’t say I regret a single penny.

Shopping Christmas

Sunday after church we went to the Southern Women’s Christmas Show. Somehow I had managed to skip this event all my life. But wow, Charlotte knows how to put on a Christmas Show. For the uninitiated, it’s just a bazaar type thing but that actually have it decorated so it looks like you’re walking through a village of shops. There are full rooms decorated and Christmas scenes and it’s just very pretty and exciting and inspiring, albeit a bit much for the kids. Three building full of vendors literally put Lexi on the floor. They were definitely ready to go after three hours but if you ask, they loved it as much as we did. I bought some sparkly red decorations to add to the tree and I’m really excited to decorate this year.

Watching Hart of Dixie

And between all that, I was obsessively catching up with Hart of Dixie. And that’s a whole other post. Seriously, I want to do a whole other post on it.

Hope you guys had a great weekend and are preparing for a lovely Thanksgiving weekend. I’ll be back tomorrow crying all over my keyboard about Emma’s 10 birthday!