I post this with much fear and trepidation and with as much respect to the families involved as I can possibly muster. Our hearts are with you.
Monday evening I was driving home from work in the rain. With the impending snowstorm, I knew the drive would not be a short one. After an hour of driving, I was nearly home, just an exit off of the interstate and a few miles and I was there. I decided to go an alternate route and head down the Interstate one more exit to avoid traffic in town and come to my house from the South side. Traffic grinded to a halt and my short cut apparently was cut short by an accident in the next town which was backing up traffic all the way up the Interstate.
Later, I heard the grumbling on Facebook about a fatal accident involving a drunk driver on one of the main roads. I didn’t think much of it. The next morning, though, I yelled at my screen when I saw the article announcing that the drunk driver was someone I knew.
Casie, the article said, had a blood alcohol level over the legal limit and rear-ended a vehicle, killing a young 22 old mother named Kristen Knight.
I cannot wrap my head around the devastation on either side. Like, I have been sick on my stomach thinking about it since I heard. As I type, it is 2 in the morning and I cannot sleep because it is heavy on my mind.
Listen, I have very little tolerance for drunk driving. It is something my family talks about often. Our kids, at a very early age, understood what drunk driving was and understood what devastation it could bring. Drunk driving is not just a mistake, it is a choice. We pay our bills with that belief.
And then Monday comes and Casie is the one making that choice. And while I in no way condone her decision, I can tell you that’s not the Casie I knew. Casie was one of the sweetest students in my graduating class. We weren’t extremely close, but I remember her to be a gentle spirit with a smile on her face. She was active in school and voted best looking in our Senior Superlatives. She had a supportive mother and by all accounts, I knew her to be a believer.
But somewhere, something must have gone terribly wrong. The facts state she had another DUI charge in 2008, so perhaps it’s been going wrong for a long time.
And I can’t help but think of my emotional affair and so many bad choices I made. Sin that entangles us does that to us. Our souls get enslaved and we say yes to our master without counting the consequences.
Oh, the consequences this time. Two mothers. One whose life was taken too early and another ruined.
To Casie I want to tell you that I have no stones to throw. I will be the first to set mine down, understanding that I am simply lucky my bad decisions haven’t yet had such devastating consequences. Redemption is available through Jesus Christ our Lord. He still has plans for you. He still loves you. He still forgives you. The crowd may not, but God says nothing—nothing—can separate his love from you. You may have gotten busted on Monday but I think you were busted up long before then. Use this opportunity to draw close to Him and let him heal those parts of you. He can give a new heart and a new zeal and fill all of those places you’ve been trying to fill. People are crying for you to rot, but God is crying to let Him redeem.
To the family of Kristen I would say a million apologies. Our family has lost loved ones due to drunk driving and it will turn a life inside out. It is absolutely terrible what has happened. I would beg of you, though, to work towards forgiveness of Casie. She might be the one sitting behind bars where she rightly deserves to be, but if you do not let grace and forgiveness take over, it will be your own souls barred, tortured and enslaved by bitterness. And it’s no way to live. No way. Do it not for her, but for you. Why do you forgive someone like Casie? Because God first forgave you. If his mercy is big enough and good enough to cast all of your sin as far as the east is from the west, then it has to be big enough for Casie’s too.
To others reading, I have on my heart two things we can do.
First, for Kristen’s family, a fund has been set up to take care of their expenses. Donate what you can and let’s rally around this family and help them in their time of trouble. Let’s show a world who York County really is because I know it to be full of compassionate, loving, Southern souls who know how to take care of each other.
Second, reach out to Casie and her family. I’m trying to get more info on how, but she has a long, terrible road ahead of her and is going to need support from wherever she can get it.
And finally, I hate to sound trite but we have to take a look at this and remind ourselves we are all only a decision away from altering so many lives. If it can happen to Casie and Kristen, it can happen to us. Let’s keep our roads in York County safe–please do not drink and drive. If you ever EVER need a ride anywhere, Scott and I will drive you, no questions asked.
I am praying for peace for all of us. That God would rain down a spirit of grace in our region and give us the ability to forgive and that it would remind us how desperately we all need a Savior every single day.
Update
Letters can be mailed to:
Casie Terrell Cunningham
Inmate #: 48763A
York County Detention Center
1675-3A York Hwy
York, SC 29745
Wow…Amy, I am so very sorry for your loss. I wish that there was something that I could say that would help to heal your wounded heart. I read your story with tears in my eyes. My father was an alcoholic – and I remember many times being a scared little girl in his car as he drove while drunk and being pulled over. (I’ve actually been processing that quite a bit lately – as we’re coming up on his 20th sobriety anniversary). This is very close to my heart. I will be lifting Cassie, Kristen, their families, and you up in prayer in the coming days. Wish I could give you a big hug…
Ginger – Just One of the Boys recently posted…A Happier, Healthier Us ~ Week 2
Same to you, Ginger. Thank you.
Well said.
Beautifully said. Absolutely perfect.
Thank you, Amy. This is so well put.
My heart is broken for both families and especially the children. May God carry them all through this tragic time!
A sad reminder of how quickly our lives can change.
And yet also a beautiful reminder of God’s grace for us, even when we are at our lowest.
Thank you for sharing your heart Amy.
Hugs
Heartbreaking news.
How quickly our lives can change.
Thankful God’s grace is there for all of us when we make mistakes, big and small.
Thank you for sharing your heart Amy.
Hugs
Perfect words spoken! prayers for both families involved. For We know not what we do!
Thank You for sharing your heart.
I pray God will use this to touch, heal and guide many towards the Lord.
You and your words are surely filled with the Holy Spirit! We oft forget about the unfathomably unmerited grace and mercy of God, not to mention His ONE sacrifice that offers us forgiveness of our sins. Lest we forget, we are ALL sinners as you have so eloquently stated and we carry heavy burdens that He can make light (not disappear!). Blessings be upon you and your continued writings.
Thanks for sharing Amy, this was very touching. My thoughts and prayers are with all involved.
Thank you so much for your kind words. I really need that. I have lost so many people to drinking and driving its hard to forgive such a bad decision when there are too many other options. I knew the family of the victim not the driver. I hope she follows Gods path and for fill what every it is he has in store for her. I will not reach out to her family but I will prayer for her.
So very sorry for your loss and I will continue to pray for healing. Thank you for your kind words.
Thank you so much for this. So well said. Praying for everyone involved. I am hoping this tradegy will make more of us think harder about the decisions we make and make better choices for the future.
Amy,
Thank you for sharing this story. I had not heard about it until your post popped up on my Facebook timeline today. I could have been Casie. And I could have been Kristen. And my heart aches for both of them and their family and friends. Just based on the limited information available to me, I believe I probably have a lot in common with Casie. Alcohol abuse/alcoholism is a mind-altering, brain-numbing, deadly problem. The ripple effect from the abuser/alcoholic to everyone affected by the disease spreads far, far away from the sick person. I will keep everyone involved in prayer. I pray for peace and comfort for Kristen and Casie’s families. I also pray for God to show Casie how the enemy uses alcohol and drugs to destroy us and others. Thank you for not stoning the sinner; I have been that sick person and am truly grateful for God’s grace and mercy.
Brittany Griffin recently posted…#Determination
Brittany, thank you for sharing. I know Casie would like to hear encouragement from you directly if you have time to write her at the address above. So glad you have found your healing.
I seek healing every day. Recovery is a life-long process. I feel compelled to reach out to Casie, and will do so. Thanks again.
Brittany Griffin recently posted…#Determination
I graduated with you and Casie and, like you, I have been so heartbroken over this situation since hearing about it on Monday. As you said, this was not the Casie that I remember and it’s very difficult to reconcile this person with the sweet girl I went to school with. My heart hurts for both families involved. Thank you for writing such a beautiful article.
I know Cassie as well. Her family and mine have been close for years. It made me physically ill to see her mugshot….so sad….such hopelessness in her eyes. BUT GOD. She will need a lot of love and encouragement….reminding her that nothing can separate her from her Father. He is the final judge and He says that His blood covers all sins. Thankfully, Cassie was raised in this truth…so that truth is in her very broken heart. Time and God will heal……..but she will never forget. That punishment is worse than any stones thrown by the “holier than thou” individuals. For Kristen’s family…their heartbreak is just as traumatic. I pray that they will find peace in time…peace that only God can give. No one wins in a situation like this. Everyone hurts. But God…….
I could not have expressed how my heart aches for these two families better! I love Casie and know her well! This is such a tragedy!!! I can’t even bend over to even try to pick up a stone as my sins are great…but my Savior is GREATER!!! He has a plan and sees the big picture here! I pray that God keeps his hands on all of us and softens our hearts and souls so that we can love one another through this and draw closer to Him!!!! Love you Amy!!!
Well written. Thank you for your wise remarks about forgiveness and compassion! I pray for Kristen’s family and Casie…may they feel God’s love!
Hello Amy, I was truly impressed with the gentle yet firm truths from the word of God that you shared with us about Mondays accident that changed many lives for years to come. One for eternity, another left with pain, regret, and guilt as she reflects on the events of that day that left the community stunted, hearts broken, children without a mom, and I’m sure fear of what the future holds for her now.
I know Casie’s family personally, and my prayers go out to them. They are wonderful Christian people that I had attended church with for many years. My heart hurts for all involved in this tragedy, especially for the children, and all that know and love these families. The Lords loving kindness indeed never ceases, for His compassion never fail. They are new every morning; Great is His faithfulness.
My prayer for all is that God’s peace will quiet their heart, comfort them as they endure the uncertain future that lies ahead of them. That those that do not have a personal relationship with our Lord and Savior, will seek Him and find the saving grace that God alone can offer.
Thank you for writing this article, may it bring faith in God to the lost and hurting world around us, and strength and comfort to all that are left with a broken heart.
Compassionately
Judy LaValle
The only thing I could think when I saw her picture was she looks like she could be you or me. I just felt an overwhelming sadness for her and the victim’s family. Thanks for the address and for pointing us all to be Jesus with skin on for this young lady.